A year ago

A  year ago the kids and I spent the day baking.

A year ago we had a calendar full of events scheduled.

A year ago we were figuring out where to go on vacation.

A year ago we the boys were in preschool and looking forward to kindergarten.

A year ago Zac could not shake a cold and kept running low grade fevers.

A year ago we lived without any cancer terminology.

A year ago we lived our last day free from the reality of pediatric cancer.

A year ago I took this picture of Zac not realizing cancer had invaded his body.  It's the last picture I took on February 9, 2016.

A year ago we went to bed not realizing what was going to happen the next day.

Battling Fevers

Zane is continuing to fight fevers.  Once the Tylenol kicks in he is ready to play.  Since he has a virus he can't leave his room and we can't go in any of the common areas on the 7th floor.  To say we are going a little stir crazy is an understatement.  

They are running a few more tests just to make sure they haven't missed anything else.  Otherwise we now wait until his body can kick this virus.

Opening his new doll.

Giving "Brittany" her rattle

Giving her her bottle

Playing with his doll

Making a lion face on his cupcake.

One of the nurses from clinic brought his a gingerbread house to decorate.  He had a blast doing this!

Zane is in the hospital

On Tuesday Zane was admitted for a fever.  Tuesday morning the boys had labs and we found out Zane had an ANC of 30. By Tuesday afternoon he started running a fever and he was admitted to the hospital that night. He tested positive for the rhinovirus which causes the common cold. Since it's a virus he was put on droplet protection, which means he can't leave the room and we can't go into any of the common areas on the 7th floor. 

He is still spiking fevers and his ANC is now at 100. We are now waiting for his fevers to stop and his ANC to rise. 

Saying Goodbye

I went back to El Paso to say my final goodbye to my grandma.  As expected it was hard seeing her one last time.  On one hand I'm grateful she's no longer in pain but on the other its hard to imagine life without her.  

It was nice seeing everybody again but also very bittersweet as this was the last time for us to gather as a family at grandma's house.   

Grandma - You will be missed!

Tuesday morning I woke up to the news that my grandma had gone to be with the Lord.  While I'm grateful she's no longer suffering I'm heartbroken that she's gone.

A sweet moment between my grandma and Zane.  (My dad accidentally stepped in front of the camera.)

Talking with Zoe.

So happy to see Zane.

These pictures are from the last time my kids saw their great grandma back in July of 2015.

Zac entertaining my dad and grandma.

Zane giving grandma one last kiss goodbye.

The last picture I ever took of my grandma.

Snow

Sunday morning we woke up to snow.  The kids wanted to go sledding so we put on all of our snow gear and headed outside.  Thank God we are able to walk out into our backyard and go sledding.

Zane

Zane climbing to the top of our little hill.

The boys on the sled.

The boys.

Zane loving the snow.

Zac

Zoe and Zac sledding.

Zoe.

Christmas Tree

On Saturday morning the Bob took the boys to pick out a tree.  He told me Zane got out of the car and spotted the one he wanted.  It's a little big but that's alright we will take it.

Zoe trying to lift Zane to the top of the tree.

Decorating the top of the tree.

Two at a time.

Zac.

We're not making a safety video.

Sweet girl.

Almost done.  I still need to add the tree skirt.