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First, roll around in the wet grass.
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Second, instead of getting a cool drink of water just find a nice puddle and lay down in it. And then be really stubborn and refuse to move for a couple of minutes.
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Third, find higher ground to showcase how dirty you are. This will cause your owner to stare at you in disbelief.
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And last but not least, sit on the table with a smug smile because you know you have won.
Do this and you will be headed off to the "spa" in no time at all....